Bridge, Boom, Brass, Brains and Gum or, Real or Bullshit Part 3

Howdy Dorks!

You ready for part 3? Me too!

Let's see if I have everything I need to write.

Computer? Nope. It's part of my process. I write in crayon(red, if you must know), then rewrite in pencil(No. 2 Ticonderoga or giant Disney), read it into a tape recorder, listen and type it on an old Smith Corona I won from my appearance on Double Dare, then scan it into a computer... All this I do for you...

Crayon? Yep

Booze? Duh.

That's it! LET'S DO THIS!!

I forgot the list...

NOW LET'S DO THIS FOR REAL!

#11 The drawbridge of the Disneyland castle works, but hasn't been used since 1983 and only once before that-- during the grand opening.

This one is pretty common knowledge... What? You didn't know it? GET OUT! Oh! I'm sorry that was rude... PLEASE get out! Jungle Cruise jokes are the best!

In 1983 it was opened to reveal the newly refurbished Fantasyland... So, if we are lucky, we will get to see it open again when they do another update of the current Fantasyland attractions, which is a pretty solid rumor but I don't know if there is a target start date yet. Let's just guess wildly... It will start... January 5th, 2016.

#12 Disney World is second only to the US Military when it comes to buying explosives in the US.

Doesn't seem out of the realm of the believable. It does kinda seem like an apples to oranges thing, but one is used to create "shock and awe" and the other is used to bomb the crap out of things. See what I did there? Used the old bait and switch... zigged when you thought I was going to zag...  Disney is pretty tight lipped about their fireworks budget, but I have heard estimates that say Disney World spends between $1 and $1,000,000... Kidding... I hear it's between $50,000 to $80,000 a night.

Have you see that shit? Disney puts of an amazing fireworks show!

That last one isn't of any fireworks... but Pluto is just so darn adorable.

Let's call this one a push... Seems logical, but without numbers, I am unwilling to call it one way or another.

#13 There is a nondescript golden marker in front of the Disneyland castle. Rumor has it that it is the center of the park, but it is more likely an original surveyors mark.

Geez, this time they stole my thunder and debunked their own comment. Assholes!

From what I have been able to deduce(I am kinda like the love child of Batman and Sherlock... I was originally named Batlock), the actual center of the park has never been officially marked. It is a surveyors that was used marker to make sure Main Street was centered on the castle. There are actually at least 16 of the markers throughout the park. Here is a link to some pictures of the other markers.

Here is a great blog post that gives some pretty solid information that the Castle spike can not be the center of the park. They make their own graphics people! It's worth it just to look at the pictures, you don't even have to read anything!

We are flying through these tonight! Woohoo!

#14 You can order "the Grey Stuff" at the Be Our Guest restaurant. I hear it's delicious.

I don't believe them, so I asked the dishes! HAHA! Aaaahhh... Yep, this is true. Have some cast member friends who recently got back from WDW and they actually had it. They said it was delicious! GO FIGURE! Apparently it is an Oreo cookie mousse.

photo courtesy of Pete Werner of disunplugged.com

Looks... good?? I dunno how I feel about it. I would try it if the Future Supreme Leader were to order it.

#15 Gum is not sold in any Disney park. Seriously. Don't ask for it.

True! Gum is a pain in the ass. Gum + guests that clearly love to throw stuff on the ground = a headache for cast members. No gum has been sold in the parks, but the Tobacco shop was open until 1991... Go figure

I think that is it for now!

New record... 12-2-1

Here is what's coming up tomorrow! A BUNCH OF STUFF THAT I DON'T CARE ABOUT! I am going to have to find a way to jazz this crap up!

Went to the parks yesterday. It was crowded. It was grad night. It was like my post from the other... but reality... let that sink in...

Random Disney Thought of the Day: How great is it that in this day and age, Disney is in the enviable position of actively trying to keep people away? People keep saying that they are raising their prices because they are greedy, but in actuality they are trying to make it less crowded so the guest has a good experience.

Stay Dorky my friends.(If you didn't read that like in Dos Equis, Most Interesting Man in the World voice... go back and do it again! I probably should have warned you ahead of time, but at this point I just figure you can read my mind.)

-Jumba

P.S. I am running late for work, just so I can get this out to you.. I am only saying that because I want you all to know what I am willing to endure to continually bring you this "quality" content. Your happiness is job one, for me... well, maybe it's like job three... but it's still top five-ish...

P.P.S. Follow the facebook page for all the up to date Evil Genius Stuff you can handle! And just for shits and giggles... go back and read some of the older posts