Nothing(or Everything) to Do With Club 33... or, Last Night Was a Blur

Hey Dorks!

Ahhh... Got lots to talk about today. I am going to start at the very beginning, that's a very good place to start(Sound of Music reference already? I am going to destroy with this post). Here is what I have on tap for you. Fun times at Cove. The first ever Evil Genius Guide to Disneyland Meet Up. Pictures with celebrities. And what you have been waiting for... Club 33! Boom! I have been inside the mysterious building and after reading this you will feel like you were there too... and by that, I mean full to the point of wanting to puke, maybe a little(a lot) hung over and definitely, a little better off than when you woke up.

First off. Fun times at Cove Bar.

Look, we love Cove. I am not ashamed to admit it. The staff is awesome! The location is... a synonym for awesome! The cocktails are(let me consult a thesaurus on this) formidable, as well as astonishing. The people we meet there are the best! FSL and I were meeting friends, Jules and Mario, so we decided the easiest place to meet was Cove. Cut to three guys coming in and sitting to my right, a CM that we know(we will henceforth refer to him at Fist Bump) was talking about the Man of Steel trailer, we all had our opinions, BOOM conversation started. Due to my naturally gregarious nature, that may have been enhanced by a cocktail or two, the repartee never ended. Here is what I do know(a.k.a. remember). Matt, Erik(with a k) and Jason were some of the coolest non cast members I have had the chance to hang out with at Cove in a long time. Here is what I don't remember. Most everything else! Hope I didn't say anything too embarrassing or offensive... Haha! Ohhhhh... Long day...

As you may recall, I was doing a contest live in the Parks. It wasn't too difficult to find me, I sat in the same spot all day, but no one ever came looking... EXCEPT Brianne and her son, who were visiting from Northern California. First ever Evil Genius Guide Meet Up! No one else found me, so they were the lucky recipients of all my mystery pins! They had just started pin collecting and it was awesome to see that Steven had some of the same pins I have... Captain EO and Chernabog... Maybe there is hope for the youth of today!

Fun times at Cove? Check! First Meet Up? Check!

Right before World of Color started a different group of people sat down by us. I was looking at one of the guys because he seemed familiar. FSL and I aggreed that he looked like Mark, one of our favorite contestants from Season 4 of So You Think You Can Dance and it turns out... I was just being racist...

 Just kidding. It was totally him.

                      

                   
He was there with his agents... apparently he loves Disney, don't know if he loves semi intoxicated fans, but he was nice enough to take a picture with us anyway.

May have said some offensive things to them... Don't remember. The agents were not big fans of Lacey Schwimmer, I can tell you that much.

Photo with celebrity? Check!

And now... On to what you have been waiting for!!

Drum roll.......

FSL, being the Worlds Greatest Dectective(fuck you Batman, if that is your REAL name), solved the great GIF pronunciation debate!!! I always assumed it was GIF, but it turns out it is actually GIF. Who knew?? That's with a soft G. Learn to read! Geez! Apparently the "creators" of the format don't like phonics... The first word of the acronym is graphic with a hard g sound. Wouldn't it make sense that GIF was pronounced with a hard g? Yep. But oh no... It's pronounced like the peanut butter... FOR NOW!!!

That was the ol' bait and switch! I am going to do my Club 33 post sometime next week.


I can't lie to you guys... Here it is...

Club 33 is still officially a "secret" although, between you, me and the trees, I'd say that most people have at least heard of it. It is usually spoken of in hushed tones, in dimly lit back alleys...  and on nights just like this one...

Preparing for the 1964 Worlds Fair in Flushing Meadows, NY, Walt noticed that there were a lot of  "VIP" lounges set up to take care of the corporate execs that were involved. Walt hatched a plan to come up with his own VIP area for the corporate sponsors that helped get Disneyland built. I am going to derail here for a second...

There has been a lot of dim witted assholes who are up in arms that Market House is closing and being replaced with a Starbucks. People are moaning about how awful it is that Disneyland is going "corporate." "Walt would roll over in his grave." I have actually HEARD people say that! Guess what you morons? Disneyland would not have been built if there was no sponsorship from corporations!

Back on track.

There is wild speculation as to where the "Club" got it's name. "Wild" may be stretching it a bit... It's not like anyone says it has anything to do with the Freemasons or anything. What is that FSL? One of the stories IS that it's from Freemasonry? Well, I will be damned. Maybe the Knights Templar hid the Holy Grail in the park... I smell a treasure hunt! Some other stories are that Walt just liked the look of 33, others think that if you pushed 33 over it would look like two "M's"(or two "W's" depending which way you shoved). There are even rumors that the address was made up in order to obtain a liquor license. While Club 33 is the only location inside of Disneyland that serves alcohol, BOTH parks maintain full liquor licenses for the entire park. The two stories that seem to make the most sense to me are, that the name is in tribute to the 33 sponsors that were active in the park during the building of the secret location. Considering the original idea behind the building it seems kinda... logical. That is the one I like the best. The other story, which is the simplest, Club 33 got it's name because of it's location along Royal Street. Blue Bayou being 31 Royal Street and the shop to the right of the door being 35 Royal Street

When it opened in 1967 the Club not only had corporate memberships, but also started allowing individual members, which brings us to today, where is is still maintained as a Members Only private establishment. There is a membership fee and annual dues. It's expensive and I won't try to speculate. Aww! Hell... Why not? I will say at least 47 billion fee and 25 million annual dues... I may be off... If any members are reading this... feel free to correct me(see what I did there?)... They recently switched to a multi level membership and I believe, they are currently taking in new members... What do you say we all pool our money together?

The day before out reservation we got a call to confirm our 2:15 lunch. The dress code isn't as strict as it is for dinner. Basically no cut off shorts, no tank tops... Kind of what you would expect in any fine dining restaurant.

To get in you need to go up to the door, lift a little panel and hit the buzzer. There is actually two panels, the lower one used to contain a slot where members could slide in their member cards and gain entrance that way, but they have done away with that.

This is the lower slot, where Members used to be able to insert their key.

A host will open the door and confirm your name and grant you access to the lobby. I got the feeling that the host isn't someone you want to mess with. The lobby is full of rich, dark wood. On the left side is a staircase that I have dreamed of climbing to enter the secret restaurant since I heard that the Club existed.

To the far right is a desk where the door host waits, perched like a sentry to greet the guests and keep the riff raff out. In the middle of the room is an antique glass lift.

The story goes like this. Walt fell in love with the elevator while in Paris. The owner refused to sell it, so Walt sent a team over to take some exact measurements and samples and made an exact replica to adorn the Club. If you ever take the Walk in Walt's Footsteps tour, you will get to go into the lobby to get a chance to see the lift and staircase for yourself. We waited quite a while in the lobby. I was beginning to feel a bit unwelcomed. At least host called upstairs and said we had been waiting a "long time", I got a good vibe from her... We got to go up soon after that.

Oh. And if you are wondering if they enforce the dress code... Yes. We saw a couple get denied access to upstairs because the woman was wearing cut off shorts AND a tank top! The host handled it really professionally. The couple apologized and rescheduled for the next day.

We took the lift up and were met by another host who took us to a waiting area while they prepared our table.

There are two dining rooms upstairs. The Trophy Room is probably the most famous of them(more on that later), and the Main dining room which is actually across Royal Street and above the French Market.

Royal Street

Lunch is set up with a first course, which is served buffet style and has different salads, cheeses, soup, warm appetizers and shrimp and crab, your main course and then ends with a trip(or two) to the dessert bar.

We were sat at the tail end of lunch so the dinning room wasn't too crowded.

If it weren't for the fact that you were inside THE Club 33 it would just feel like any fancy restaurant. The rooms are showing their age. The parkay floors are not the best option for a restaurant and definitely need some work.

Claw foot. Not so good for Parkay.

We ordered a bottle of champagne to celebrate our Anniversary and headed to get out first course. The food was very good. The soup was a roasted tomato and was delicious. There was a lamb tart that was amazing and a asparagus and cauliflower panna cotta that had a great balance of flavors.

FSL ordered the Chateaubriand. I ordered the Chicken. Yep. The Chicken... but it comes with truffled macaroni and cheese!! 

Just noticed it says "carrot" singular, not plural on the menu for the chicken

The breast was HUGE... like, Splash Mountain animatronic chicken huge. The skin was crisp and the meat was juicy. It came with asparagus that was cooked well and very tasty, one piece of carrot... I thought is may have fell on there by accident, but it was good, I wish there would have been more. The mac and cheese was... disappointing... and I totally mean, disappointing that there wasn't more! It was rich and creamy. I dare say it rivaled the Carthay Circle Biscuts! Shut yo mouth!

There is my ONE carrot.

Chateaubriand

 By this time I was full enough to not even want to entertain the idea of the dessert bar, but then they brought out a special Anniversary dessert for us.

Annd after that, I thought I was going to die. I was having the chocolate sweats.

We hit the dessert bar anyway, because when were we going to have the opportunity again. They were pretty good. I don't think I can pick a favorite... I just know the Club 33 cookie was the worst! Haha!

PIE!

Barely able to move, we mustered enough strength to go out to the balcony. 

After that we made our way out. Bought some merch...

And took in some of the sights...

Harpsichord made for Lillian

The table to the left with the white marble top was in Mary Poppins

Phone booth from The Happiest Millionaire

Inside the harpsichord

I know what your really want to know. How were the bathrooms?

Men's room

What the crap is this?

Weird

I totally took some of the paper towels from the bathroom... Maybe I can give some away in a contest!

Dry your hands in luxury

On our way out, we stuck our heads in the Trophy Room. Took a few pictures. Walt had wanted to set up the room with some animatronic animals that could interact with the guests through microphones hidden in the light fixtures above the tables. His set up never really came to fruition. Apparently the whole Watergate thing kind of turned people off from recording devices.

Microphones would have been in the center part of the chandelier

Max occupancy... 33!

A CM came in and told us a brief history of the Club and the Trophy Room. There used to be more "trophies" in there but they have been removed by the Disney family. We asked about the plans for the refurbishment of the club. I thought he was going to be tight lipped, but he was surprisingly candid. The closure is supposed to happen sometime this year although no time frame is set up. The remodel will expand the size of the dining area and utilize a storage space on the second floor. I was trying to snap pictures but I believe I heard him say that there was going to be a new entrance or maybe it was an additional entrance at the Court des Anges staircase. I asked if the trophy room was going to remain intact and he said that the Trophy room was going to become part of Disney history... What? That's kind of sad. I am glad I got to see it before it goes. The kitchen is going to be expanded to use what is now, in my opinion, the most historic and talked about part of the Club.

Over all the food was very good. They say that it comes out to about ninety bucks PER PERSON! Hahaha! And I had a chicken breast! Was the chance to eat there worth every penny? Fuck yes.

Free chocolate! Well, not really free...

The service in the restaurant was... Lacking? I guess that is the best word to describe it. At first I thought it was because we aren't "members", but everyone was getting the same service. It was inattentive and lackadaisical. I think in a place like Club 33, that has so much mystery and lore surrounding it, the staff COULD make it a magical experience for everyone but it just seems like they are hanging their hat on the fact that you are inside the famous Club. If you want to have amazing service for a similar cost at the resort, go to Napa Rose at California Adventure. It was hands down the best dining experience of my life. The food was amazing(not just pretty good) and the service was exemplary. Carthay Circle also has super service and great food. If you can't get into Club 33... Go to Carthay! You will not be disappointed!

Thank you to Ashley for facilitating this experience for us!

I think that's it! Met some great people. Had a great meal. It was a perfect Anniversary trip! As always, thanks to our lovely Future Supreme Leader for 10 great years of marriage!

Stay Dorky Dorks!

-Jumba

P.S. I forgot to mention... I was so hung over the next morning... sorry Mom!

P.P.S. Woke up with "fuck you - patent pending" on my hand...

P.P.S. Newsboys GIF!